Waiting on God

Nobody ever said waiting on God was easy.  It challenges me every day.  I have been waiting for my heart to heal from recent pain...when would my heart be healed?  I'd learned so much, what else was God trying to teach me?  My princess band aids are off and the scar is still fresh.  It could be easily damaged again.  The scar is fragile and my heart not quite healed.  So by not completely being "over" this heart break, how can I move forward without my heart being ripped apart again?

Let.It.Go.

As much as I want to tweak and control and make things happen the way I want them, I have to let it go.  It's in God's hands.  My heart is in His hands.  I need to continually pray for God to guard my heart and then let Him be in control of this situation.

Two things.
1.  The situation involves someone whom I want to have a redeeming relationship with Christ.  My heart hurts so, that they don't have that relationship that I cling to every day.  I don't want this person to spend eternity in hell.  I want them to know, to understand, to just get their need.  I want to shake them and say - don't you get it?!  But that wouldn't help.  I dream of the day when they tell me, or when I find out and I can jump up and down and hug them and be so excited for them.  Will it happen?  I'm praying like crazy and I see God working....waiting is hard.

2.  The heartache above involves this person.  Yes, I know getting involved with an unbeliever is clearly talked about in the Bible....I made a poor choice and chose to ignore the Holy Spirit and the Lord.  I tried to control the situation, ignoring the Lord and doing what I wanted.  And I learned a lot.  It turned out badly and could have destroyed our friendship.  My relationship with God is stronger and the lessons are invaluable.  This whole study on Let.It.Go has really hit home with my heart.  My heart is healing, the relationship above is healing.  Where it's going to go, only God knows.  I'm going to be patient and wait on the Lord.  Maybe this is who He has for me and that it's just going to take time to get there.  And then maybe He's just using the whole situation to mold me and shape me into a beautiful woman after His heart and He has someone else out there for me.  I just have to trust God.

And so as much as I want to be a teenage girl and giggle and be silly about all the little things and interactions, I have to be an adult and think about it in a different way.  It's between him and God.  If this is what God wants, He will work it out, but I can't worry about it, I can't pine over it.  I have to leave it in God's hands because He knows what's best for me. He wants His best for me.  It's now about waiting and trusting. I trust God with my heart and I KNOW WITHOUT A DOUBT, He will do what's absolutely best for me.  I have fears, but my God is bigger than my fears.  He can move mountains.  I love Him.

Trust God.  Wait patiently.  He will answer beyond our greatest expectations.